written by Putra Muskita

Whether you’re too “busy” to cook meals worthy of 4 Sehat 5 Sempurna, or you have just arrived from a mudik filled with binge-eating and sleeping, sometimes everyone just needs to “lighten up” a bit. Here are some easy ways to lose weight if you live in this little island called Singapore.

Take the train instead of the bus. Or better yet, walk.

Why take the train instead of the bus? Sure, the bus usually take more time, even without factoring in the errors Iris Nextbus makes. All in all, taking the bus offers plenty of conveniences:

1. With just $50 for a monthly concession pass, you can take as many bus rides as you want.
2. Even on the rush hours of 9am and 6pm, the chance of getting a seat on a bus is still 830249753 better than getting breathing space at standing room capacity inside a train. Unless you live in Pasir Ris.
3. According to the Land Transport Authority, there’s a bus stop every 400 metres. You walk less.

Well, my friend, if you want to lose some jiggle, I have news for you:

1. Standing up and being compressed like a can of sardines burns more calories than sitting down and doing nothing. If you take the train, you don’t really have a choice but to stand up.
2. Being a cheapskate about your choice of transportation is something only you can change. I can’t do that for you.
3. You could use the walk. Thanks to the wide pavements and ubiquitous lights, Singapore is pedestrian-friendly and all those excuses you cooked up in Jakarta wouldn’t work.

Stop the suppers.

Eating supper is an inseparable part of Singaporean culture. It’s fun. It’s indulgent. It brings people together. It fosters racial harmony. It builds peace, serenity and love on earth. Also, it is the most fattening meal of the day. Plain prata with just a dab of curry on the side is permissible, but what if you can’t resist the scarlet temptations of Maggi goreng? Suddenly that glass of Milo Godzilla looks lusciously refreshing and that whiff of chicken and cheese roti john could wake the dead from slumber. Now you may just find yourself scarfing all three! It has happened before to me. I can’t explain how it happened. It was a blurry madness of oily slick spoonfuls of joy. It’s fine, really. Just don’t be surprised when the next time you go clubbing, those skinny jeans can’t get past your knees.

Know what to eat at Kopitiams.

If you are a student, most likely you’ll be eating your daily nosh from a food court where a bowl is an impending heart attack made of carbs, oils, sugar, and monosodium glutamate. Everyone is on a student budget here. Let’s face it: no one can afford to eat Subway every day of the week. Well, the very least you can do is to know your options and choose the healthiest choice available. Eat yong tau foo! Okay I know the uncle never uses gloves when he loads the bok choys and fishcakes, but this article is not titled Hautu: Avoid Salmonella Attacks. Pick the soup option without noodles or rice. Though his theories on carbohydrates might be dubious, Dr. Robert Atkins will thank you for it.

Drinks? We all know teh bing isn’t exactly the poster drink of the Health Promotion Board. Try a teh-O kosong bing next time. While it tastes vaguely like dishwater, a tall glass of teh-O kosong bing might just be the appetite suppressant that you need. You’ll never feel hungry for anything ever again.

Shop!

For girls, shopping is a sport because it involves walking from shop to shop, rummaging shelf to shelf and the numerous trips to the mirror to make sure this canary yellow satin shorts doesn’t make your derriere look like a yellow pom-pom. Well, guess what, doing that can make you thin!

If you traverse every single mall in the 1.2 km stretch of Orchard Road, the calorie you burn is probably equal to a grande latte at Starbucks. Window-shopping is an even better sport. Let’s just say you have less opportunities to max out your credit card and reduce the chances of being disowned by your family for all the exercise you’re getting.

For the guys, if shopping doesn’t tug at your metrosexual hamstrings then you can probably stand politely in some inconspicuous corner doing spot exercises as you wait for your girlfriend. You burn more calories than sitting down. Still, you’d look pathetic either way.

Cook at home. It’s cheaper, too.

Cooking at home gives you more autonomy over what goes into your stomach, and what doesn’t. As long as you don’t cook instant noodles or load up on MSG, everything you cook at home is much healthier than the stuff you get at food courts. What’s more, it’s cheaper too! One of my friends cooked at home and she spent $200 a month. A month! Holy Mother of Gyoza?! Vegetables are ridiculously cheap, even in places like Cold Storage. Imagine how much more you could save if you shop at Sheng Shiong or your closest traditional market! All it takes is a willingness to learn and recipes to steal from popular food blogs. Try it out once in a while and see what you come up with.

The savings from homecooked meals plus the reduced transportation expenses from all that walking can go towards your budget for recreational window shopping! Your new lifestyle follows a beautiful cycle all over again. Follow the steps above and I guarantee that you will be thinner, a little.